


Love me like you do

by queenofmaui



Category: Supernatural
Genre: Angst with a Happy Ending, Caring Sam, Fluff, Guilty Sam, M/M, Requited Unrequited Love, Sad Dean, Smut
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-03-24
Updated: 2015-03-24
Packaged: 2018-03-19 09:04:24
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,353
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/3604350
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/queenofmaui/pseuds/queenofmaui
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>When Sam left for Stanford both of the brothers tried to forget their feeling for the other. Now that Sam's back, the feelings will come to the surface.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Love me like you do

**Author's Note:**

> Hi! First fic I have ever written so please be kind. All mistakes are mine. I would love comments and helpful tips!   
> Also a side note kuddos to all of the fanfic writers, I never realized how hard it is to write a fic so thank you for taking the time to write! I hope you enjoy!

Part of the reason Sam left for Stanford was that He needed to forget about his feelings for his brother. He had started to notice Dean giving him weird looks and he thought for sure Dean knew his secret and thought he was disgusting. He couldn't bear having the love of the life think he was disgusting so he left with a barely mustered "see ya". During his Stanford years, Sam started to be able to bury his feelings completely by locking them away in the corner of his heart and focusing on the college experience. Sometimes he would have the urge to call Dean or hitch a ride to go see him but he knew if he did, Dean would give him those strange looks and he just couldn't bear that again. So he distracted himself with Laura, Jenna and finally Jess. Although he didn't love Jess like he did Dean, he still cared for her a lot which was why it broke his heart when she died. Since Sam returned to hunting with his brother, again, Dean has been acting extremely weird. He is up at the crack of dawn to go get breakfast or go for a drive which was weird because ever since Sam could remember, Dean would sleep until at least 10:00am unless they had a hunt. On top of that he was being uncharacteristically nice by getting Sam his rabbit food on a regular basis and frequently letting him drive. When they went to a bar, Dean rarely went home with women anymore which made Sam feel slightly awkward when he announced he would be going home with a cute girl. Although it didn't happen often, Sam would still hook up with the occasional girl even though it wasn't who he truly desired. Even though he was still trying to bury his feelings down, they still came up to the surface to haunt him. It was incredibly difficult being with Dean in close quarters again and Dean's strange behavior did nothing to quell the odd feeling in the pit of his stomach.

**********

The moment Sam walked out the door to go to Stanford Dean's world fell apart. To see his brother walk out of that dingy motel room hurt worse than when a Wendigo ripped his flesh to the bone. It hurt worse than when Cassie dumped him. And it hurt a hell of a lot more than when Dad ditched him to move on to bigger and tougher hunts. Sam was the one person in the world who he had trusted to not hurt him. For the remainder of the week that Sam left Dean was a mess. He drank enough to put an Irishman to shame and hooked up with over 25 women. To say that he was dying inside was an understatement. After about a month of drinking, fucking women (and even a few men), and living without purpose Dean finally started to hunt again. Once he started he couldn't stop. After one hunt was finished he started the next regardless of his injuries. His Dad called him once in a while to see if he was alive but other than that he was on his own. Eventually he stopped drinking and his hookups became less and less. The empty void he felt without Sam never left though. He knew Sam had many reasons for leaving but his final decision was sparked when Sam was taking his shower in the motel room. When the water turned of Sam called. "Dean can you bring me my clothes?" "Get 'em yourself bitch" "I can't you jerk they're in my bag and the towel is too small!" As soon as Dean heard that the towel was too small to fit around Sam's hips, blood started rushing to his cock. Jamming the heel of his hand to his denim covered hard-on, Dean grabbed Sam's boxers and t-shirt off his bed and slowly walked to the bathroom. When he opened the door, Sam was drying his hair with the tiny towel giving Dean a glimpse of his muscles that were building from all of the hunting they had been doing. As soon as Sam noticed him he blushed and tried to cover his flaccid cock with the towel. Dean dropped the clothes on the lid of the toilet and fled. He tried to make sure Sam didn't see his rock hard cock but he knew the cat was out of the bag. Sam kept avoiding him and looked away when he was speaking to him. It hurt but he knew it was his fault. He knew he drove Sam to leave. He drove everyone to leave. He was disgusting.

When Sam started hunting again after Jess died he knew it wouldn't last. He knew one day he'd wake up an the other bed would be empty. As soon as Sam stopped grieving Jessica's death he would be out the door so fast Dean probably wouldn't even get to say goodbye. The sad part was, Sam had no reason to stay. Dean was worthless and everyone left him anyways, it was only a matter of time. So Dean did everything he could to make Sam happy so maybe he would stay a little longer. He got up early to get him the freshest coffee and breakfast right off the grill at the local diner. He made sure Sam always had organic food for dinner. Even though he knew his feelings would never be returned it still hurt when they went out to a bar and Sam grabbed a lady with a flash of his smile complete with the dimples. Granted it didn't happen often, but it did and it cut Dean to the deepest part of his soul.

**********

On a Thursday night Sam and Dean finished up their most recent hunt with a nasty wearwolf. Dean had a few minor scratches and bruises on his arms but other than that he was fine. Sam on the other hand required stitches along his side from the middle of his ribs to his hips. "Lay down on the bed Sammy and I'll get you fixed up" Sam didn't object immediately stripping down to his boxers and laying sideways with his arm above his head. Dean grabbed the sewing kit and his bottle of Jack Daniels which he handed to Sam and told him to drink up. After Sam took a few swigs he handed it back to Dean to clean his wound. Dean kneeled on the bed facing Sam's back and splashed some Jack on Sam's side. "Okay the worst is about to come so just relax" "Dean I've done this a million times just get on with it" Sam braced himself for the needle which punctured his skin. As Dean continued the stitches, Sam started to relax more and more relishing in the careful touches Dean was giving. When the last stitch was finished, Dean tied the knot and leant down to kiss the last stitch which was closest to Sam's hip. As soon as he did it, he felt Sam tense and he realized what an idiot he was. He let his feelings freak Sam out again and now Sam was going to disappear without a trace. Dean jumped up and started to pack up his stuff so he could leave before be had to watch Sam leave forever.   
Meanwhile Sam was jumping for joy. Dean returned his feelings! He wasn't alone in the constant daily struggle. His brother loved him as much as he loved his brother. As soon as the initial shock and happiness had died down Sam realized Dean was no longer on his bed and was in fact packing his stuff to leave. "Dean where are you going?" Silence. "Dean we need to talk. Please" "Sam drop it I just need to go" Sam got up from the bed and grabbed his brother's wrists thus halting his motions to run out the door. Although Dean still refused to look Sam in the eye. "Dean look at me please" Dean squeezed his eyes shut and shook his head. "Can't watch you leave" he mumbled. "Dean I can't understand you when you mumble" "I said I can't watch you leave" "Dean why would I leave? I love you! "Stop trying to let me down easy. I know you're going to leave so just go" "Dean, no one is leaving this room. Look I know you think I hate you but I don't. I'm hoping what you just did means you want to be with me as not only my brother but also my lover because ever since I was 16 I've wanted you to touch me, fuck me and love me. I've always loved you De please don't go" "Sammy...you have to be sure. You can still walk out that door, I won't stop you I promise" Sam had enough of his brother's lack of self-worth. He bent down, frame his brother's face and kissed those beautiful lips that he dreams about every single night.   
As soon as Sam kissed him, his brain ceases functioning. All he could do was moan and wrap his arms around his little brother's waist. They kissed deeply for what felt like seconds before pulling back and resting their foreheads together. "Can I take you to bed?" Sam whispered quietly. "Sammy...please" As soon as he had consent Sam manhandled Dean onto his bed and kissed him passionately. Their tongues danced together in a battle for dominance before Sam broke the kiss to remove his shirt and then Dean's. Sam kissed down Dean's chest before reaching his navel which his tongue darted into making Dean squirm and moan. "Sammy please" "Please what?" "Stop teasing, touch me" Sam did as he was told and undid Deans belt, unzipped his fly and slid his jeans and boxers down before throwing them on the motel floor. As soon as Dean was naked before him, he palmed his jean-clad cock moaning "mmm De you're so perfect" Dean blushed and hoped the comment meant Sam was going to stay but he still had his doubts. Unaware of Dean's internal struggle, Sam leaned down and swiped his tongue over the tip of Dean's leaking cock before grabbing it and swallowing it whole. "Holy fuck baby brother" Sam moaned around Dean's cock sending vibrations right to Dean's core. As Sam continued sucking Dean down, Dean kept threading his fingers through Sam's hair. "Sammy...'m not gonna last if you keep doing that" Sam pulled off with a pop and proceeded to shuck his jeans and briefs giving Dean a view of his twitching cock. "Oh fuck Sam I need you in me now!" Sam wasted no more time, grabbing the lube and a condom from his duffle he slicked up a finger and circled Dean's entrance. "Have you ever done this before?" Sam asked. "You're the only one I would ever bottom for baby brother" Dean replied. Sam's cock got impossibly harder at the thought he would be the first to fuck Dean. "I gotcha De" Sam said as he pushed his finger in. At first Dean clenched up but with Sam whispering soothing words in his ear he started to relax allowing Sam to slide another finger in alongside the first. As Sam was scissoring him open, Dean took the opportunity to lean up and kiss Sam senseless. He never wanted to forget the taste of his brothers lips. Before he knew is Sam ha three fingers in. As Sam pumped his fingers in and out he angled them to the side hitting Dean's prostate turning Dean into a babbling mess. "Now Sam please...I love you" Sam smiled at Dean's rare display of his love for him. Sam rolled the condom on and lubed up his cock before lining up with Dean's entrance. As he pushed in, Dean's erection began to flag under the pain. Sam grabbed Dean's cock an stroked it lightly as he pushed in inch by inch. Once Sam was fully seated he kissed Dean and gave him time to adjust before pulling out and slamming back in. The brothers both moaned loudly as Sam made love to his brother like he never did before. "De I'm close..." "Me too Sammy". Those were the last words exchanged before Sam began brutally thrusting into his brother. Sam's orgasm hit him like a train, spilling into the condom as he buried his face in Dean's neck. Seconds later Dean came onto Sam's stomach with a shouted "oh OH OH Sam!". Sam pulled out and rolled onto his back disposing of the condom in the trash before sighing. When Sam sighed it brought Dean out of his post-orgasmic trance. Of course Sam regretted it Dean thought. Dean curled up an turned away from Sam letting his tears finally break free. When Sam turned to kiss Dean he found his brother shaking with barely suppressed sobs "De what's wrong? Did I hurt you?" "No but you regretted it" "Dean I was sighing in pleasure. I would never regret what we just" Dean turned to face his brother. "Are you sure?" "Of course Dean, I meant it when I said I loved you and I promise I'll never leave again" Dean smiled before leaning in to kiss Sam lightly. After a couple of exchanged kisses Sam pulled back. "Dean can I ask you something?" "Sure shoot." "Why have you been acting so nice since I came home?" Dean sighed "Sam you'll think it's stupid just drop it please" "Dean come on" "I didn't want you to leave okay? I thought maybe if I was nicer you would stay a little longer before leaving me again". The guilt in Sam spread like a virus. "Dean I never meant to hurt you by leaving. I thought you knew I liked you and thought I was a disgusting freak" "Sammy no! I was disgusted with myself for loving you so inappropriately." "Looks like we need to work on our communication doesn't it?" "Shut up bitch" "Make me you jerk" 

The End


End file.
